Conquering the Rock

Back before my surgery I set 10 goals for myself once I had lost, or started losing weight.  You can see the full list on my July 2011 post - Setting Goals.  Anyway, I accomplished #1 when I visited my brother in London earlier this year.  On Friday I took care of #6 - Walking up Stone Mountain.

I took the day off from work, slept in, then got dressed in the sports bra and sweats.  I packed grapes, a banana and my trusty diet sweet tea from Publix and headed to the mountain.  I got there just after noon, mustered my courage, fired up iTunes and started my climb. 

The beginning is not too bad, but about a quarter of the way up you have to start making higher steps.  My knee is still problematic, so where there was a way to skip a rock, even if a bit out of the way, I took it.  So one mile journey to the top, was going to be more like one and a half miles for me to walk around what I couldn't step up.  I rested when I needed too, took pictures when it suited me, and reflected often on how majestic the views were.

I couldn't help singing along to "The Climb", which although it's Miley Cyrus, it's a beautifully written song with wonderful lyrics.  Here's a sample:

Ain't about how fast I get there

Ain't about what's waiting on the other side

It's the climb

There were times I thought I'd have to stop, especially when I realized that however far I went I would have to go back down just as much.  It was clear that God was with me on this journey, from the random selections on my music to the breathtaking scenery and the people he placed in my path at just the right time.  A friendly smile, a knowing nod, a wink of "you can do it", and others struggling like me all gave me the courage to power on.

Just after two I reach the top and as I turned around to be awed by the view, God gave me another great gift.  As I looked out and spotted downtown Atlanta, "How Great Thou Art" began playing. 

O Lord my God, When I in awesome wonder,
Consider all the worlds Thy Hands have made;
I see the stars, I hear the rolling thunder,
Thy power throughout the universe displayed.

Then sings my soul, My Saviour God, to Thee,
How great Thou art, How great Thou art.
Then sings my soul, My Saviour God, to Thee,
How great Thou art, How great Thou art!

When through the woods, and forest glades I wander,
And hear the birds sing sweetly in the trees.
When I look down, from lofty mountain grandeur
And see the brook, and feel the gentle breeze.

Then sings my soul, My Saviour God, to Thee,
How great Thou art, How great Thou art.
Then sings my soul, My Saviour God, to Thee,
How great Thou art, How great Thou art!

It couldn't have been more perfect or fitting.  God knows just what we need, when we need it.  I don't know why I don't trust that more.  He shows me everyday how awesome he is, I just need to be more aware.

So I spent about 30 minutes atop the rock, basking in my accomplishment and then headed down.  About halfway down, the real pain started setting in.  I knew I would be paying for it tomorrow.  Still I managed to make it down in about 30 minutes, and while I might have stopped to ponder the best route, I never sat down to rest like I did going up.  Probably because I knew I would never be able to get back up if I stopped.  I have to wonder how many of the younger and more agile folks were secretly laughing at my timid steps and tree hugging as I cautiously carved my path. 

I got into my car, smiling like the cat who swallowed the canary, ate my banana and headed home.  I was so happy to have done it.  I thought about doing it each year as a "renewal" of my commitment to better health and weight loss.  Then I woke up Saturday morning, unable to move my legs, and decided that might have well have been my last climb!



Stalled but not Stopped

Nearly at the one year post-op mark...officially it will be October 27th and as predicted, the weight loss has significantly declined.  I've lost 126 pounds so far, which is great, but I still have another 100 to go.  I feel like I have stalled but I haven't given up!  The boys continue to give me great support.  A few weeks ago both of them said I was "rockin'" some denim capris I had gotten.  Then this past weekend when Matt was home and we had an impromptu family gathering when my younger brother came to town, he gave me a great compliment.  As we were driving he said, "Wow!  I just realized how much weight you've lost by the amount of room between you and the steering wheel."  Yes, it's true, I no longer have the steering wheel fighting with my belly for control of a turn.  Those little things make a big difference in my confidence and excitement.

I've also taken other steps for life improvement.  The Center for Surgical Weight Management offered a seminar titled "Building a Better Life From Your Complaints".  That clearly was a seminar designed with me in mind!  There were 8 participants along with the leader and that allowed for some fabulous conversation.  We talked about how our choice of words, phrases, tone and inflections are a result of our thoughts, feelings, beliefs and emotions.  It ended with us creating positive affirmations.  Which totally took me back to the Saturday Night Live skit where Stuart (I think he name was Stuart Smalley) would say, "I'm a good person and dog gone it, people like me!"  We had to create daily affirmations using only positive words.  So for instance you couldn't say "I am not going to be mean" since both not and mean are negative words.  You'd have to say "I am going to be nice".  I wasn't ready for that level of commitment yet, so I started a bit more realistically.  The leader says she has hers taped to her bedroom ceiling so she sees it when she wakes up, on her bathroom mirror and refrigerator.  Yes, I too had to restrain from sarcasm when thinking where I "post" my daily affirmations throughout my house.  Anyway, below are the four I wrote.  I'll write more when I know these are really embedded in my brain.

"I am an awesome mom!" - This one is going over Andrew's bed too, ha ha!
"I am a hard worker doing quality work" - This one I need to post in the boss's office.
"I am important" - Necessary to remind me to take care of myself too.
"I am blessed" - This is my daily reminder of how much God has already done for me and how much more He has in store!

I'm off tomorrow and plan to do something special, just for me.  I'll let you now how it goes, weather pending.