Heart Trouble

In order for my primary care physician to clear me for surgery he wanted to ensure that from a cardiac standpoint I had no issues.  Good idea I thought, so he did the EKG in his office.  It was a slightly abnormal so he sent me for a stress test at the hospital.  I had the stress test two weeks ago and it came back with a slight abnormality as well.  The verbiage read "moderate sized minor defect of the anterior wall".  Of course my eyes saw all the words but my brain focused on moderate size and defect.  So my doctor said he would refer me to a Cardiologist for further evaluation but not to worry.

So my appointment was scheduled for today - two weeks after the stress test report.  I've spent the last two weeks working and living as normal.  Visiting the good psychologist and the nutritionist, lost three pounds, and got Andrew and Matt both starting back to school.

But this past Wednesday I had a good scare.  Woke up with some chest pain.  Right in the center of my chest and it was achy and I even felt it in my back.  I took some Advil and started working (was working from home this day).  The pain never really went away even after I ate, showered, and walked Rosco.  When it was still there after dinner I started thinking about the "moderate sized minor defect" and my brain went into overdrive.  I had talked to Chris the night before and told him I felt fine and he said something like, that's what everyone says before they have a heart attack.  And the truth was I felt fine up until Wednesday.

So at 9:00 p.m. with my chest still hurting, my brain in overdrive and my worry that if something happened during the night Andrew would be the one to find me, I headed to the ER.  One of the benefits of working at the hospital is I can tell Andrew I am going to the hospital and he just assumes I am working.  I decided no need to scare or worry him if I was just overreacting.

Of course when you say chest pain at the ED they whisk you back for a stat EKG.  That was ok but some lab work came back with elevated levels.  So they told me to get comfortable because they were calling the on call cardiologist and I wasn't going anywhere.  Had a chest x-ray, CAT scan and more blood work.  Once the Cardiologist talked to me, looked over the labs and took my history, he decided the safest thing was to have a cardiac cath done, especially since I was looking to have major surgery.

So from the ED I went to the 4th floor in the Duluth hospital and then at 9:00 a.m. they sent me over to the Lawrenceville Hospital via ambulance.  Straight into the cath lab I went and they started prepping me.  If you don't know how this procedure is done, they go in to your artery via the groin and run the catheter to your heart then shoot some dye in and look for clots.  That meant part of the prep was a "bikini shave".  Yeah I was super excited about that.

Then the best part was when one the techs came and talked to me and said I was going to go next and this is what he was going to do...in order to give the best access to the groin he goes in and "tapes up" the stomach.  He said he was going to be giving me a tummy tuck and I asked him to leave the tape on.  He thought that was funny, I thought it was a good start to seeing how I could look with a smaller stomach.

Anyway, when the cardiologist came out to talk to me and answer any questions before going back he said they were having a lot of success by going through the wrist instead of the groin if I would prefer that.  It would certainly be easier to deal with and as long as I had a strong pulse in my wrist it wouldn't be a problem.  So I agreed to let them do my wrist which meant I had been shaved for no reason and wasn't going to get the tummy tuck.  Good news, no one else was going to be seeing me below the waist.

Of course, having heart trouble and being female means giving up any modesty regarding your breasts.  I'm pretty sure at least 10 different people touched my boobs, mostly moving them out of way for electrodes, and not one of them bought me dinner or took me to a movie.  They didn't bring me flowers, send a card, or even sing me a love song.  Lucky for them I was just excited my boobs got some attention.

Turns out I have a 20% blockage in an artery.  The good news is it is not significant enough for intervention such as a stint or angioplasty but I do need to pay attention to my diet and of course exercise more.  These are things I can do - especially with the surgery.

The best part - they cleared me for surgery...so hopefully I'll get that scheduled soon!

Why Skinny Girls are Bitchy

Ok, having experienced the diet of a "petite" woman this past week I know why skinny girls are so bitchy.  They are hungry.  If someone would just feed them, or they would eat, we'd all be happier.  I mean really, if there weren't any "skinny" girls there would be no way to measure against the "fat" girls.  Kinda like a grading curve in school, we just need a weight curve.  I mean curves = sexy body right, so that's my new argument.

Anyway...here's a normal diet as recommended by my nutrionist:
Breakfast
1/2 cup grits (no salt, no butter)
1 cup skim milk
1 1/4 cups watermelon

Lunch
3 oz Turkey
2 slices whole wheat bread
2 Tbsp light mayo
1 slice cheese
Light Yogurt
Cucumber slices
Raw broccoli

Dinner
3 oz hamburger patty, grilled/broiled (not fried)
1 cup potatos
celery, carrots, onions to season

My dog, Rosco, eats more than that in a day.  I realize most people don't eat as much as me but is it ironic that I am eating like a bird and live in Cardinal Lake, on Robin Lane, which is off Meadowlark Lane?  I think I need to move to a subdivison called Carb Village and live in the cul-de-sac off Bread Alley which connects to Pasta Avenue.  I know I'll live there one day...it's called Heaven.

Anger Management

I've been talking with my psychologist (the good doctor) about issues that trigger my anger. Turns out that anger is really the secondary emotion and what I am really feeling is more like disappointment, isolation, inequalities, vulnerability, etc.  It was really eye opening.  There are also varying degrees of anger ranging from annoyance, irritation, mad, aggitated, irate to rage.

Of course my favorite part of the conversation is when he asked how I dealt with it.  I said I usually handle it one of two ways.  I either snap and yell, especially if with my children...or I become very sarcastic.  Sometimes the sarcasm is in response to the stupidity I deal with at work and sometimes it's just to poke fun.  I told him I really felt like sarcasm was my spiritual gift, but that it was just left out of the Bible passage.  He thought that was funny, I thought it was honest.

So I thought it would be good to keep an anger journal along with my food journal.  So here's what's happened this week:
Monday - Annoyed that my supposed backup didn't invite me to an important meeting at work.
Tuesday - Irritated that Andrew had not unloaded the dishwasher or done his share of kitchen duties for the week.
Wedensday - Annoyed that I have misplaced my ATM card.
Thursday - Mad that a project manager in my office scheduled me for testing on Monday when the equipment won't be delivered until Tuesday?  I mean really...does he think I am just going to test the air flow of the room?  Who can't read a calendar?  Worse yet, I had to point out to him that his scheduling made no sense. 

Ah, see how my level of anger turned into sarcasm when it got higher up the scale?  Interesting isn't it?

As for my eating journal...well that's another post.